My husband calls it «drawer wear». You know, lingerie that he loved and bought, but that I wouldn’t be caught dead in. The poor pieces languish in my dresser, never to see the light of day (or a flicker of candlelight on a sexy evening).

Ready to talk a reluctant lady into some seductive skivvies? Time for some pointers, boys. Let’s give you the winning edge in selecting lingerie that will leave her stunned, delighted and ready to go!

Know her size: Buy too small and you’re in the dog house, dude. Creep into her closet and take notes (yes, literally) on her jeans and shirt size. Feel your way through her undies drawer and, again, write down the sizes. You might even want to take a picture of your beloved with your camera phone. If nothing else works: ask. Bring your notes and pictures into a fine lingerie boutique with you and show everything to the sales associate. (She will soon become your new BFF.)

Comfort level: Is there a man on the planet who can confidently stride into a lingerie store and not feel like he was sucked back into the bowels of his teenage, acne years? I’m sure they exist somewhere, but they’re elusive, rare and not often seen.

Note to you: you’re normal to feel anxiety. Sales associates are selected by the owner for their friendly and gracious ways. Really. They don’t care that these lingeries pieces are sex aids. Trust me, they only want to make you happy and get your signature on a credit card slip. (And they’re going to work their darndest so that your woman doesn’t return the piece at a later date.)

Your mantra is: «I’m a normal guy. These lingerie ladies see men all day long. I’m one of zillions.» Which is totally true. The boutiques report that a full third of their customers are guys. One boutique owner says, «some mornings, I see nothing but men. We’re used to it.»

One last soothing comment: the owners and women who work in the fine lingerie boutiques are usually lingerie-afficienados. They love to talk about their passion and loves anyone who loves what they love. No different than Mustang-lovers or 49-er-lovers. See what I mean?

Fabric: Nobody wants itchy and scratchy near their private parts. The finest silk, the best lace, the softest material leave a woman in awe. Fine lingerie boutiques are brimming with jaw-droppingly gorgeous lingerie pieces (see a few here: Five Star) created out of the best material available. Enjoy it. Appreciate it. Select the one that calls to you. (And, no matter what: steer clear of any lingerie store found in a mall. You’re looking for a fine lingerie boutique. Not Victoria’s Marketing Secret.)

Know her style: If your woman never, ever wears a thong and remarks that they do remind her of dental floss. Guess what? Don’t buy a thong. Since she wears a nasty, gray tee shirt to bed, it’s not your fault that you don’t know what she loves in lingerie.To begin, rifle through her dresser drawers again. What do you see? If it’s boring underwear, then at the boutique buy boy shorts, full underwear that are gorgeous, but cover her rear and chemises with robes. What’s a chemise? Sort of like a dress, but it’s really lingerie and many of them come with a matching robe. You can’t miss with a beautiful chemise/robe-combo. Teddies come in second (unless she hates her legs.)

Last, let the sales associate pick something. Give her a clue or two by saying «my wife is rather conservative and hasn’t bought a new bra in two decades.» The sales associate will feel your pain and immediately go to town helping to select a stunning choice.

Know her areas of discomfort: Have you heard your woman time and again say, «don’t look at my stomach!» That means she hates her stomach. If she says, «my thighs are like tree trunks.» That means she hates her thighs. If she says I really hate my boobs. That means, she really hates her boobs.

Another clue: check out the bathing suits she wears. Not the ones she buys, the one she actually wears. The bathing suit clue will tell you volumes in what she likes and doesn’t like about herself. (Remember, start safe and one day you’ll be confidently selecting a corset with garters. Or even a Swarovski crystal-studded thong. A man can certainly dream.)

By knowing what she dislikes about herself, you’re armed with stellar info. to make a fabulous selection. Hates her legs? Go for the gorgeous long gown with robe. Hates the tummy: Teddy or chemise. Hates her breasts? Share this tidbit with the sales associate and let her pick something that will camouflage the situation. Hates her whole body? (Very sad.) Again, go with a gorgeous, long negligee and a matching robe (but lots of silk and lace, of course).

Armed with the right info, you can move mountains, soldier! One last tip: for a rapid fire education in the various fine lingerie designers, check out our Five Star choices.

Ready. Aim. Light a fire, Tiger.

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